BLAH SATURDAY...

It's another cold and snowy dull day in Michigan and I have a case of the winter - and Saturday - blues. There are so many things I want to do but don't have the...inspiration to do. I checked out cross stitch freebie sites last evening and ended up saving a bunch of them in my favourite places. I had great intentions of getting up this morning, getting one printed off and starting on it. Did I? Nope. I got up this morning, got ready a couple books to mail out, went to Post Office, grocery shopping and then nothing. I did tidy up a bit but have since sat down and caught up on TV/DVR watching - an episode of Bones, Criminial Minds, Lie to Me and a couple of Chelsea Latelys. Now the day is almost over and I have to go to work tomorrow.

I feel like taking some vacation days but a) I don't have people to fill in for me as they are both in school and b) I want to hang on to a lot of vacation time so I can go to England in the summer. B) is the only thing that's keeping me going - something to look forward to. I'm feeling a little sorry for myself today (if you aren't able to tell). I have a dentist's appointment this week on my other day off (Thursday) to have 2 teeth pulled - what fun! As much as I detest the dentist the thing I'm more worried about is that I'll have to drive there in the snow. I'm such a wimp.

I'm done writing. I'm too negative today. :(

Tracing ancestors...

So, when I was home last year in England I watched So Who Do You Think You Are? Yes, I know there's an American version but I really love watching the stars I recognise from childhood and later and seeing their histories. Anyway, I ended up going to YouTube and watching a couple of older ones - I watched Julian Clary, Graham Norton and Stephen Fry. Very interesting. It got me thinking about my own ancestors. I don't know a lot about them. My Dad left when I was young and we didn't really ever talk about him. I visited his mother and her live in 'friend' (I always thought he was my Grandad but it was only later that Mum told me he wasn't actually her husband or my biological Grandad), but we didn't really talk about him. As a child I really wasn't too interested.

The internet is a wealth of information - some free and some paid for but I'm not really sure what paid sites I should even trust. I'm the first one (at least recently) in America, so I have to go to English sites to find out about my people. I'm having trouble with specific dates and it would be nice to actually look at the birth certificates, death certificates etc to be able to see the names and make connections. I always planned one summer going back and doing a search with my Mum.

Alternatively... I could win the lotto and have someone do it for me. Sigh. I have to pop off now and go to bed - work tomorrow and 2.30am looms...

Anyone else....

...tired of snow? I don't know where you are but here in Michigan I can't remember the last time I saw anything other than snow. It's this time of the year that I begin to think the cold and snow will never end. It's dark and cold in the morning and dark and cold in the evening. Our driveway is covered with snow and ice. It's usually dirt (or mud, depending on the season) and even snowblowing doesn't clear it completely.

Sigh.

I can't wait until Spring. It's one of my favourite seasons - Spring and Autumn. I think it's because of the signalling of times changing. Autumn is cooler, colourful and signals the end of the summer, the coming of the harvest and then winter. Spring signals the ending of the long winter months, more sunshine and warmer temperatures. I love seeing the renewal of life and the promise of things to come. There is just so much promise in spring.

It is that thought that keeps me going through the long winter months. When the winter solstice comes I automatically look forward to the days getting longer. Once the shortest day is over there is no where to go but up. It just seems like it takes forever to get there!

I would post more but got to go get my DD and her friend from the mall (my least favourite place in town). They went shopping for a friend and are ready to be picked up. Take care.

Dentist - yuck!

I hate going to the dentist. In fact I really, really dislike going to the dentist to the point of putting it off and not going for a long time. Last year one of my unwritten goals was to go back to the dentist. I was growing very concerned for the state of my teeth - didn't want to end up toothless in a few years!

I did get up the courage round about September and took the first step. I found somewhere that specialises in chickens - yes, people like me. Between then and now I've had quite a few appointments - I have a LOT of work to be done (as I can afford to have it done).

Today I had to go back for more fillings - three teeth in the front. I am proud of myself for going. I know people go to the dentist all the time and a lot of people can't understand the fear, but for some of us it's real. I've put my mind to it to keep going and plan to keep it up. I have to. There is no choice.

Battle of the books

Ok, so here's the thing - I did sort through quite a few of the paperbackswap books and also sorted out some more books to either list on there or donate. I figured there's no good listing them at PBS if there are a gazillion of them already listed - better to donate then. So I checked the stock and made a box (small but still a box) of books to donate. I feel a lot better.

On the downside I did buy another book - couldn't help myself. I almost - ALMOST - stopped at Barnes and Noble but managed to pass on by. I did actually go through the car park and out the other side (I was VERY tempted) but I avoided the place. My downfall was when I was buying groceries and there was a book calling my name and it was only 5.99 not the 7.99 list price so - SIGH - I gave in and bought it.

I now have a paperback copy of Black Magic Sanction by Kim Harrison.

BOOK HOARDING

It's one of my many goals (see previous post) to get my book collection under control. Well, some call it a collection others call it hoarding. I've been checking out the web and other blogs and feel glad to know I'M NOT ALONE. Yes people, I am NOT the only book hoarder around. There are lots of good suggestions to get this collection under control including not buying any books until you read x amount. That's not the problem. Once I have the books I don't want to let go of them. Oh there are some I don't mind getting rid of but others I love to read over and over again. I like the strong female characters. Perhaps I even wish I could be a bit more like them.

I know I read to escape. Who doesn't want to escape the everyday dolldrums? There is nothing better on a cold winter's day to curl up with a nice blanket and a really good book. I can forget all my cares and worries and forget about the weather outside.

Sigh

HOWEVER - tomorrow I am sorting through a pile of books. I have a couple totes listed on Paperbackswap.com (if you've never been to the site before check it out!) and they need to be moved out of my bedroom and somwhere else.

I'll update on my goal.

2011

I survived the day at work New Year's Day - so tired yesterday. I came home from work and slept for about 3 hours - should have slept longer. I felt like a zombie all day.

TODAY... I feel almost normal. Phew. Now for the plans/goals for the New Year.

EXERCISE - I was doing good there for a while, but I got out of the routine and exercise is sparodic at best. I have to get back into the routine. It's that first step that's the hardest.

WRITING - I want to start writing more. I really enjoy doing it - fiction and blog - but I need the motivation to get moving. I need a dose of confidence too. I've written stories and such for as long as I can remember but I rarely show the writing to anyone. I think I fear the rejection. I need to have faith in myself. I don't think I've ever been confident about anything.

SPIRITUALITY - I need to learn more, to take the time to read and practise my faith. This is another area of my life where I need some confidence. I shouldn't care what people think, but I do. A part of me is afraid that if people found out about my beliefs they would not speak to me again. I know this is not just a problem for people of Pagan beliefs, but I think this faith is so misunderstood that people jump to conclusions. People who know me now shouldn't think less of me if they find out my beliefs but - sad to say - I know there are people who would.

FAMILY/MARRIAGE - need to work on this and that's all I'm prepared to say. I think this might be the make or break year.

STITCHING - I want to do more. I really enjoyed stitching and it was a big part of my life for a long time. Since I started work full time the things I find enjoyable have been pushed to the background and I feel as though I'm just running on automatic - going to work, coming home and dealing with home stuff, going to bed and starting all over again. I need to take time out for me.

BOOKS - I have to get the growing mound of books under control. I'm addicted to buying books. I'm seriously thinking about buying a NOOK but I love the feel of books, the comfort of them. Not sure I could give them up completely. I do have to tackle the MOUNTAIN of books in my room. It's beginning (note I say beginning) to resemble something out of a Hoarders episode.

If there is anything else I'll add later, but I think that's more than a good start. Hopefully I'll post more and keep on top of my goals.